


Soldier's Heart

by pradaghost



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Post-Episode: s03 Chat Blanc, Post-Episode: s03 Desperada, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-16
Updated: 2021-02-16
Packaged: 2021-03-18 15:14:43
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,540
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29491899
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pradaghost/pseuds/pradaghost
Summary: Adrien can't escape the memories of the months he spent saving Ladybug. Every time Marinette closes her eyes, she sees icy blue one's staring right back at her. They thought they were fine, but it's becoming too hard to bare. Can they work through the trauma while still keeping their secret?A fic about the aftermath of Desperada and Chat Blanc, and how our hero's deal with it differently.
Relationships: Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir/Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug
Comments: 1
Kudos: 21





	Soldier's Heart

Adrien’s eyes slowly peeled open as the light from the window poured into his room. He sat up, half expecting to find himself collapsing at the effort. No such thing happened. His body was sore, but no more than usual. It was weird. Physically he was fine but his brain was fried. Before he could even wipe the sleep from his eyes, the voice of his kwami interrupted his thoughts.

“Good afternoon sleeping beauty,” the little black cat said, floating in front of Adrien’s face.

“Aww, Plagg you never tell me good morning,” he said, swinging his feet off the side of the bed and stretching.

“Well usually you’re awake in time to feed me. I’ve had to go hours without my beautiful camembert, even my secret stash is gone!” Adrien rolled his eyes and started towards the dresser, still adjusting to the lack of pain in his body. 

“I’m gonna pretend that I didn’t just hear you admit to having a secret cheese stash. And stop being so dramatic, you can go for an hour or two without eating if I sleep in.” 

“Didn't you hear me?” the kwami said. “You’ve been asleep for most of the day! You’re lucky it’s a rare Sunday with your morning schedule cleared, or I think Nathalie would’ve had to break down your door.” Plagg floated through the air, landing on the alarm clock with a thump. It read 2:00 pm. 

“You’re kidding me,” Adrien sighed, running his hand through his hair. 

“Nope. Anyways, about that cheese...” Adrien was no longer listening to the little god of destruction as he threw on a pair of sweatpants and the first t-shirt he saw before taking off for the door. “Excuse me, I think you’re forgetting something!”

“Yeah Plagg, I’ll get you some of your stupid camembert. First I’ve gotta find out what I’ve missed.”

“Okay Adrien, right now I’m just hungry. If I wait any longer I’m gonna be hangry. You  _ really  _ don’t wanna see me hangry,” said the kwami, perching himself right next to a vase on Adrien’s desk. “It would be such a shame if I were to… cause any... damage…”

“Plagg watch it-” Adrien didn’t get to finish his sentence before the vase was sent tumbling to the ground by the smirking kwami. Under normal circumstances, Adrien would’ve let it fall. It was some replaceable decoration with no emotional value, and he was too far away to logically do anything. But something was different. This time Adrien saw a chance. With a running start he dove across the room, in hopes of catching the vase in time. He was nowhere near catching it. The room was filled with laughter as Plagg watched, his hunger apparently stalled with amusement.

“What were you  _ thinking  _ kid? That’s the funniest thing I’ve ever seen, you couldn’t have stopped that in time if you tried! Taking a dive like that, you really are-” Plagg was silenced where he stood when he saw Adrien kneeling above the broken vase, hands clenched on the ground, forehead beaded with sweat. His eyes were stuck wide open, and he was breathing as if he’d just ran a marathon. “Adrien? Hey kid, snap out of it.”

But Adrien couldn’t hear Plagg. Instead the sound of shattering porcelain was replaying over and over again in his head. His vision was beginning to tunnel, so that the only thing he could see was the broken pieces, and one thing was running through his mind.

_ I wasn’t fast enough. I could have made it but I wasn’t good enough,I- _

“Adrien!” Plagg’s voice finally shook the boy out of his trance. He lifted his head to face where Plagg was sitting on the desk, and the kwami’s eyes widened when he saw Adrien’s face. His eyes were filled with fear, and something else Plagg couldn’t quite put his paw on. “Kid are you alright? I thought it was just a vase, I’m sorry if it was a gift-”

“No it’s alright,” Adrien said, cutting him off. He sat back and took in the scene in front of him, allowing his face to relax. That’s when they both noticed the large gash on Adrien’s right palm as he uncurled his fingers to reveal a large shard of ceramic. Neither of them said anything. After a moment Adrien slowly got up and headed for the bathroom. “I’m just gonna, uh, clean up a bit.”

“Sure thing kid,” he said, his voice dripping in apprehension, but he knew better than to ask questions right now. 

\-------

Something was very wrong. That much Adrien knew. Even after spending months saving Ladybug unbeknownst to the hero, his body felt the effects from one battle since technically it had only lived through one timeline. The same couldn’t be said for his brain. He remembered. He remembered every re-run, every catch, every fall. He remembered how it felt like the world was going to end. Maybe it wouldn’t have been so bad if he hadn’t made the mistake of underestimating Desperada. But he couldn’t go back anymore, and worrying about it wouldn’t do him any good.

Instead he stood staring at the sink water dyed red swirling down the drain. It stung as the water hit the cut just a little too hard, but the warmth felt nice. Adrien wasn’t sure how long he’d been standing there staring at the water, but he figured it had been long enough. Grabbing a roll of bandage from the cabinet he headed back into the room where he found Plagg struggling to use a dustpan. 

“Gimme a hand kid, I can only do so much here,” Adrien smiled. Plagg had a funny way of showing how much he really cares. After the two had finished cleaning Plagg landed gently where the vase used to be. “So… you wanna talk about it?”

“Not really.”  
“Listen kid, I understand you’ve probably got a lot to work through right now but I don’t think it’s a good idea to bottle it all up. At least I think that’s what Sugar Cube would say, I’m not good at this whole ‘therapist’ thing,” Plagg was floating in front of Adrien now. “The snake miraculous can be really dangerous if it’s not handled right.”

“You think I didn’t use it right?” His tone was playful, but there was a truth to Adriens question.

“Hey I didn’t say that! I only want to check in on you, kid. Sass is difficult to work with,” That didn’t seem to help, Adrien still looked dejected.

“Luka didn’t have any problem with it,” he said, taking a seat on the side of the bed.

“You don’t know that. You only got to see the timeline where everything worked out. Luka could’ve been working for a long time too.”  
“Yeah well he’s still the one who got it right,” he said, letting his head drop into his hands. The kwami looked at him and decided that trying to approach this like Tikki was not the way to go.

“Alright, listen up,” he said. “It was just the two of you when you were Aspik. But in the end they needed Chat Noir. It wasn’t possible to win without all three of you! So stop whining about how you weren’t a good snake miraculous holder when you’re already the best Chat Noir there is,” and with that Plagg abandoned his spot by the boy to rummage through the cabinets, muttering something about hidden camembert.

Adrien looked up at the kwami before sighing and falling back onto the bed. “I know that, but I just can’t shake this feeling.”

“What feeling?” Plagg asked, popping out of Adriens sock drawer. 

“I don’t know how to describe it. It’s like my body’s only experienced this one timeline, but my brain’s been through the millions of reruns. I feel like two different people.” Plagg stared at the boy, contemplating what he said. He’d been around for a few millennia, there were very few things he hadn’t seen. Someone using the snake miraculous to relive the exact same moment for months straight? This was a first.

“I don’t know, kid. I think you need to take it easy for a while-”

“Adrien? Your piano lesson starts in five minutes!” Plagg was cut off by the sound of Nathalie outside the door. The boy sighed once again before standing up.

“Yeah, I’ll be right there,” he said,

“Um, excuse me?” Plagg protesting, flying in front of Adrien. “What did I just say?”

“What am I supposed to tell her Plagg? ‘By the way I used another miraculous that only three people in the whole world know about and spent the past few months reliving the same moment, so I’m a little exhausted. Do you think we could reschedule?’”

Plagg smiled. “Yes, actually.” Adrien rolled his eyes and pushed past the kwami. Plagg would never admit it, but he was a little more than worried. As he sat on the dresser watching Adrien get ready for his lesson, he couldn’t help but think about what Tikki would do. She was always better at comforting people. 

_ Humans are so complicated _ , he thought to himself before returning to the drawers to rummage for hidden cheese. 

**Author's Note:**

> This fic is a WIP so I promise there are more chapters coming! It might be slow since I am a full time student, but it'll get there eventually lol.


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